Pressure.

I'm returning back from my week vacation in Miami and I realized that I am being overcome by the pressure to want long hair again. I could tell I was approached less now that I have natural hair. I don't believe it was all due to the 'nap'turality of my hair, but also the length. I know I am a beautiful woman and a person that doesn't care what anyone thinks of me, but I was starting to feel less beautiful. It's not as if I am looking for something, but the reassurance is nice. When you're used to being called beautiful all the time, when it happens less often it can be disheartening. I was captain save the insecure before, now I'm being overwhelmed with those same insecurities. I am going to do a sew in before I leave for the semester because I keep playing with my hair and I want to retain length and moisture, but now I want it for a different reason. The same pressure to want long luscious locks is not the same in Iowa. I don't know if it was the Miami atmosphere but the yearning for long hair is wearing off. I think if I was to move to a place like that I would be more insecure and succumb to the pressure to change.